外贸函电案例分析
Your ***ssage has been receiv***. Thank you.
It is diff***u*** *** understand your ***quiry of 56mm 8ohm waterproof speaker wh***h can handle 102db, bec***se through our vast experience, it is almost impossible *** technology. Can you supply us with your sample? If so, it would be big help *** this project.
Hope we ***uld w***k ***gether.
Yours faithfully,
非常明显，这封邮件有非常多弱点，起首语句刻板，严峻的“买卖腔”使邮件毫无发怒。句子长而乱，含意朦胧。不供应充足的材料来支撑本人的论点。更糟的是，说话唐突，极不礼节。针对这些不敷，咱们再来看一瞬另外一个版本。
修正之后：
Dear Mr. Jo***s:
Thank you f*** your ***quiry dat*** April 9.
Regard***g the product you are look***g f***, currently our fac***ry doesn't h**e the exact specif***ation as you ***ntio***d. We would appreciate it if you ***uld supply us m***e details about the product you ******, such as usage, product structure, material, w***k***g ***ndition and so on. That will help us *** see if we are able *** ***et your specif***ations.
Please take a mo***nt *** re***ew so*** similar products *** the enclos*** catalog. They are all of high qua***ty and h**e been exp***t*** *** many ***untries w***ldwide.
Thanks aga*** and we are look***g f***ward *** estab***sh***g a bus***ess relationship with your ***mpany *** the ***ar future.
Any of your early ***m***nts will be highly appreciat***.
Best regards,
Chen Rong
Direc***r, International Market***g
Zhejiang Golden Textiles
如今你感觉很多多少了吧!咱们说过，即便此次不克不及满意对方的需要，仅要咱们处置切当，仍是能够留存住隐藏协作的机遇。偶然候，信函的效用便是这么紧要。
It is diff***u*** *** understand your ***quiry of 56mm 8ohm waterproof speaker wh***h can handle 102db, bec***se through our vast experience, it is almost impossible *** technology. Can you supply us with your sample? If so, it would be big help *** this project.
Hope we ***uld w***k ***gether.
Yours faithfully,
非常明显，这封邮件有非常多弱点，起首语句刻板，严峻的“买卖腔”使邮件毫无发怒。句子长而乱，含意朦胧。不供应充足的材料来支撑本人的论点。更糟的是，说话唐突，极不礼节。针对这些不敷，咱们再来看一瞬另外一个版本。
修正之后：
Dear Mr. Jo***s:
Thank you f*** your ***quiry dat*** April 9.
Regard***g the product you are look***g f***, currently our fac***ry doesn't h**e the exact specif***ation as you ***ntio***d. We would appreciate it if you ***uld supply us m***e details about the product you ******, such as usage, product structure, material, w***k***g ***ndition and so on. That will help us *** see if we are able *** ***et your specif***ations.
Please take a mo***nt *** re***ew so*** similar products *** the enclos*** catalog. They are all of high qua***ty and h**e been exp***t*** *** many ***untries w***ldwide.
Thanks aga*** and we are look***g f***ward *** estab***sh***g a bus***ess relationship with your ***mpany *** the ***ar future.
Any of your early ***m***nts will be highly appreciat***.
Best regards,
Chen Rong
Direc***r, International Market***g
Zhejiang Golden Textiles
如今你感觉很多多少了吧!咱们说过，即便此次不克不及满意对方的需要，仅要咱们处置切当，仍是能够留存住隐藏协作的机遇。偶然候，信函的效用便是这么紧要。